“Do you have a good baby?” Says the sweet-faced old lady to you in the shopping centre.

Just to be clear, this is code for “Does your baby sleep for long periods of time and not feed too often or at inconvenient times?”

How to answer? She means well, so perhaps “Yes, she is. She cries when she is hungry and sleeps when she is tired” is a bit abrupt.

Instead how about giving her a short enlightening lecture?

Here are the critical points:

• Babies are just foetuses who are outside the womb. In comparison to other mammal babies, they are remarkably immature. Hence […]